Ken

Ken is a vampire.

Description

• Ken
• male
• dark brown buzzcut hair
• blue eyes
• 5' 10"
• 165 lbs
• age early/mid 20s when embraced
• born in early 1940's
• 8th Generation
• Survivor (Caregiver)
• XP Spent: 0
  • 3 XP for Willpower 4th dot
  • 4 XP for Willpower 5th dot
  • 3 XP for first dot in Occult

Attributes

Physical		Social		Mental
Strength	ø ø o o o	Charisma	ø ø o o o	Perception	ø ø ø ø o
Dexterity	ø ø ø o o	Manipulation	ø ø o o o	Intelligence	ø ø o o o
Stamina	ø ø ø o o	Appearance	ø ø o o o	Wits	ø ø ø ø o

Abilities

Talents		Skills		Knowledges
Alertness	ø ø o o o	Animal Ken	ø ø o o o	Academics	o o o o o
Athletics	ø o o o o	Crafts	o o o o o	Computer	o o o o o
Brawl	o o o o o	Drive	ø o o o o	Finance	o o o o o
Dodge	ø ø o o o	Etiquette	o o o o o	Investigation	ø o o o o
Empathy	o o o o o	Firearms	ø ø ø o o	Military Tactics	ø ø ø o o
Expression	o o o o o	Melee	ø o o o o	Linguistics	o o o o o
Intimidation	ø o o o o	Performance	o o o o o	Medicine	ø o o o o
Leadership	ø o o o o	Security	o o o o o	Occult	ø o o o o
Streetwise	ø o o o o	Stealth	ø ø ø o o	Politics	o o o o o
Subterfuge	ø o o o o	Survival	ø ø ø o o	Science	o o o o o

Advantages

Backgrounds		Disciplines		Virtues
Generation	ø ø ø ø ø	Protean	ø ø ø ø o	Conscience/Conviction	ø ø ø ø ø
Contacts	ø ø o o o	Fortitude	ø o o o o	Self-Control/Instinct	ø ø ø ø ø
				Courage	ø ø ø o o

More Stuff

Humanity/Path
ø ø ø ø ø ø ø ø ø ø
Willpower
ø ø ø ø ø o o o o o
o o o o o
Blood Pool
o o o o o o o o o o
o o o o o

Merits and Flaws

• (-3) Driving Goal
  • Enable a lasting truce/cease fire between Kindred and Garou
• (-1) Prey Exclusion
  • Women
• (-1) Nightmares
  • War flashbacks
• (-1) Overconfident
• (-1) Skeleton in the Closet
  • Garou daughter
• (-2) Open Wound
  • Gunshot suffered just before his embrace
• (+2) Baby Face / Sanguine Humour

Backstory

• Grew up in semi-rural Pennsylvania
• Middle of his class in HS
• Got in to a ROTC program (maybe Penn State?)
• Met a girl training to be a nurse in college, fell in love
• Finished college, commissioned into the Army
• Stayed with his girlfriend
• Became part of a special ops team
• Sent to Vietnam during the big ramp-up of US involvement, maybe like 1961 or 1962
• Proposed to his lady the night before he left
• She accepted
• He left for the Vietnam war
• Lots of successful operations
• Then, one operation went wrong...
• Whole team was killed, he was shot and bleeding to death
• Just as the world started to fade, a young woman appeared and bit him
• He woke up later, and she was still there. And he was a vampire...
• To this day, he still has that bullet wound
• The Army declared him MIA
• His sire, the young woman, stayed with him and traveled with him for a long time
• Linh Tuyen Chu - a beautiful vietnamese woman barely 18 years of age when she was embraced
• She had been a priestess in medieval europe, learned of taoism and buddhism in china, traveled through africa and south america, basically has been everywhere
• She taught him great control over himself and the beast now within him
• Her teachings meshed well with the self-discipline he had learned in the armed forces
• After traveling for about a decade, they came back to his hometown
• His girlfriend Sally was still there -- with her 9-year-old daughter
• She was still wearing the ring he gave her on a gold chain around her neck
• Their daughter was a beautiful young girl, Sandy
• He stayed a near them for a few years, working to come to terms with himself and his feelings
• During this time, their daughter started to have some odd problems as she grew up
• One night, he heard howling echoing through the woods
• He knew there was no pack in his woods
• He followed the sound, and found a clearing with a young wolf
• Her eyes closed and as she fell asleep, her form flowed back to that of his daughter
• He held her into the night, and a few hours before dawn, she awoke
• She recognized him from her mother's pictures
• He told her everything would be okay, and that he would be out in this clearing again the next night
• Any night he heard her howling, he would find her
• He helped her through the Change, and to cope with her new self
• She discovered that her great-grandfather knew of an ancestor who suffered the same "affliction"
• After a while, her mom found out
• She brought her mother one night to see Ken
• Ken hoped to set her Sally free from him finally. Asked her to go ahead and live her life, as he could no longer join her
• Promised to keep an eye on Sandy for as long as he could
• Traveled on and off, but came back every few weeks to spend at least a month in his woods, watching out for them
• He found her a Garou mentor to help her through the rest of the Change
• He cut back on his visits after she graduated from college
• Still, he continues to visit her every now and then, even though she is quite grown up
• He can occasionally slink through her territory in wolf form to visit her

Stories

Edmonton

Cobblestone alleyway -- I take a fast turn and duck down a little, past the trash bin and into the alley. Good, there's a no light. Don't look behind you, just go. Listen. You can hear them anyway. Drop the coat.

One foot lands on a patch of black ice. Damn. Get up!

Left at the end. Two blocks up, next alley. The sky is turning red already. I can feel it -- I've got maybe 5 minutes, tops. Even more motivation to get far enough ahead of these guys. I put on some more speed just as I hear the first two coming around the corner behind me. You are toast tomorrow.

Out onto main, up the street, the sun starts to peek over the horizon. I start to smoulder a little as I jump over the fence and into the snow. Need to get out of sight. Between a few trees, and right onto more ice. I feel the crunch in my ankle as I'm still falling, sliding, under the row of hedges. Finally on dirt. As I fade into the ground, all I can think is how angry Linh will be. She won't show it. But she'll be angry.

What's for dinner?

The world is slow to come back. It doesn't come into focus, really, when you're still melded with it. But you gradually become aware that you're there, when moments ago you weren't aware of it. No way to check if anyone else is around, so I meld back out of the soil and lie there for a moment, still mostly under shrubs. Take a few minutes and fix the ankle before you get up. It'll go better.

I haul myself up and head back towards the safe house. Better take a different route, and make sure I'm not still being followed. I can see all the trampled places where they looked for me. But it seems like they gave up.

You run into funny things, walking around at night. It's early evening still, and there's a lone pretty lady walking through the park. Bad idea, hon. Sure enough, here comes a brute grabbing her from behind. I have a surprise for him. I come around quietly up behind him and take a swing. Double punch to the kidneys causes problems for most mortals.

"Run for it, sweetheart. I'll take care of this guy." She takes off. The guy is getting back up -- he's at least half a head taller and has about 40 pounds on me. Fight smart, Ken. A few dodges invite him off his balance trying to chase me down, and a quick strike knocks the wind out of him. Line up a kick and...K.O. I drag him off the path and have breakfast. He'll survive. I wonder how long he'll swear off stalking people in the park?

I finally get to the safe house, and Linh is waiting for me at the door with that look on her face. I pull out the sheet of paper with all my notes on these three -- names, addresses, families, jobs, histories. The lady one of them is having an affair with. Everything. "You said to get the info. I got the info." I walk past her into the house, towards the stairs. "Four feet sure would've helped though. I really need to learn that trick." I pull off my blood-soaked shirt and head downstairs. I can hear Linh behind me.

"Your back is burned, Ken. We need to work on that."

"One thing at a time, please." I open up my bag, pull out some gauze and re-wrap my shoulder. She just watches. She knows I learn what I learn, not what she teaches me. And I think it still bring up memories for her every time she sees my shoulder. She hasn't told me yet why it hurt her so much to see me dying. I'm learning to come to terms with the fact that she'll tell me when she's ready. Or something. Maybe she thinks she's waiting until I'm ready.

"So are we taking these guys out, or leaving very, very soon?" She's reading the page again, slowly shaking her head. "No, the job was to get the info. If we need to hustle, we'll head east." She looks up. "I have a friend in Saskatoon. From there maybe we can hit Winnipeg and then slip into the States somewhere in Minnesota."

I still don't know how I feel about going home. But it's where I need to go. I'm feeling thankful that it has been, and continues to be, a long journey.

Saskatoon

Knock knock. Linh's friend opens the door. He's an older man, of Asian descent for sure, though it's unclear to me exactly which country is his origin. His hair is more gray than not, and wrinkles cross his face. Somehow, despite his undead pallor, his skin still looks weathered and leathery, like some kind of albino elephant. Lean, sinewy arm end in long fingers tipped with claws. Shifting hair reveals pointed ears, and the moonlight glinting across his face lights up a predator's eyes.

If I met this man in an alley, I would run. No pause, no second thought. I would bolt like a deer.

He invites us in. Polite, as I expected. It's hard to tell what the bond is between them, but it does seem to run deep. He shows us into a sitting room and we take seats. I glance at Linh's face. They have already immersed themselves in conversation without saying a word.

"This is your new little one?" he asks her. I can feel those eyes. Luminescent, cold, unblinking, with a deep and mischievous cleverness. Stand in a forest at night some time and stay perfectly still and quiet. Look out into the dark between the tree trunks and, eventually, you'll see a pair of brilliant green or amber eyes burning right into your soul. His are doing that to me now. I meet them. Sometimes, even though it makes your soul burn, it's the right thing to do. I can't decide whether to count the ticks of the clock in the next room, or not. Which will make time run faster?

Linh nods and I can finally look away. Her face looks more open than I've ever seen it, but it's still not telling me anything. It's like when I was a kid, and my parents argued over dinner about something I didn't know a thing about and couldn't help them fix. So I sat there like a little kid, kicking his feet under a too-big chair and staring out the window.

"He's military, Linh."

"Was," she corrects him. Quiet but firm.

"You don't need another fighter. Why do you like these feral puppies so much?"

She rubs her face with her hand, and for the first time since I met her, she looks tired. "He's not feral, Peng. Quite the opposite. You should see where he came from -- a quiet little suburban house, a college degree, service to his country."

"The training to use any weapon his scientists can invent, ten ways to kill a man at 100 yards, and no license to question his orders?"

"I thought you would see right away that he is a hunter more than a soldier." Linh isn't looking at me.

"I am not looking at a hunter. Not yet." If anyone else said that, I would bristle. But him? He's bringing up all the things Linh started to teach me, that I still can't put together. "On some level, everyone is a hunter. What are you hunting for?" I can't tell if he's asking me, or Linh. I wouldn't know what to answer. My family? My old life? A new life? New meaning? I didn't realize how lost I feel until he asked the right question.

Linh is looking out the window, far away. "You know what I need to go hunt. It will take two nights."

He nods. "I will keep an eye on him. Your hunt must begin soon."

She looks at me. "You can understand being haunted by a soldier from your past. I have one such demon to kill. I'll be back tomorrow night, and we can move on." She gets up and, in one fluid motion, keep standing upwards, growing wings, and flying out the open window. That's a different Linh. There was no softness there, no teaching, nurturing, no meditative peace. If she is hiding me from her demons, then powerful demons they must be.

Her friend, Peng I guess, is watching me watch her go. "Forgive me, Ken. Welcome to the beautiful city of Saskatoon. I apologize for my manners. I have not seen Linh in person for so long, and many things weigh on me." He stands up. "There are many facets to our situation. It would be best if you do not hunt here, even if, as Linh tells me, your favorite prey are muggers. Let me get you something." He's smiling for the first time, revealing exaggerated fangs. I'm watching him walk towards the door, trying to figure out why he walks so strangely, like he tiptoes everywhere. As he turns to go up the hallway, I can see he has a tail, bushy and white like a silver fox. He pauses at the doorway. "If Linh hasn't already impressed this upon you -- I recommend you avoid losing your temper."

He's gone for half a minute, and comes back with a blood bag. "Sorry it's cold." I turn it over in my hand, looking for the label. "Linh has told me of your diet, Ken." I'm not sure I trust him, but I don't have a choice. I drink it anyway.

"So you've been traveling with her for almost ten years?" he asks me. It sounds like small talk, but I'm sure there's more to it than that.

"Yeah. She keeps saying I'm almost ready. For the last five years. Maybe more." At least we both chuckle.

"If she started saying that after only five, I have not given you enough credit. I don't know yet why she cares for you, but she does."

"I'm lucky to have her. She saved my life. Now she's still saving me. I think...if I had not been dying, I might feel differently. I guess I never talked to her about it, but I'm not so sure she would've done this if I hadn't been." I wasn't ready to leave this world then, and I'm still not now. It's clear Peng can see that stubborn drive, even when I stop short of saying so out loud.

"She says you're having some trouble changing forms." I wince. Yeah, okay. He turns his head and his eyes glint again. "Another viewpoint might help. Accompany me downstairs?" There's only one answer to that. Here's to a night of the most punishing Protean lessons I've ever had. I was ready to sink right down through the earthen floor long before dawn. The next evening, when I get up, immediately he's got me working at it again. And again the next.

During a break, I ask him if Linh's okay. Why would he know? But she said two nights, and she's never late.

He just shakes his head. "She always finds her way." I'm not so sure. So after we retire for the day, I force myself awake again. I make sure Peng is asleep, and steal out into the open. I push myself to get as far in towards the city as I can before the sun comes up. Into the ground, before I start to toast. Peng is keeping me well-fed, but I don't need to start the mission burned.

I rouse myself early again in the evening and hitch a ride into town. Best place to get some info is a bar, right? It shouldn't be too hard to find a beautiful young Vietnamese woman in Saskatoon. I hit a stroke of luck -- someone telling a story that just has to be about her. Unfortunately, it ends in a way I really don't like. There are some hoots and howls from the other guys, stuff about letting some other guy steal the pretty lady. But this one telling the story just shakes his head. "The guy had a sword, I don't know what the hell was with him." The other guys laugh it off. I wanted more. Buy a man a beer, he's happy to tell more stories.

I'll spare you the info-mongering. It took me the better part of the evening to find her. Up on a roof in the industrial section of town, a good 5 or 6 stories off the ground. Facing east. Bound and gagged. So cliche. She's in bad shape. Even with the gag untied, she's not saying much. I'm just starting to untie one hand when the crossbow bolt thunks into my chest.

I whip around and draw my gun. The guy is standing there cranking up for another shot. There's the sword, swinging at his hip. And he's wearing armor. Crazy Sir Lancelot armor. What the... Too bad I didn't bring any armor piercing rounds.

The crossbow, however, is not armored. Bang. No more toy to stake me with. Best way to beat a tank is to out-maneuver it. Here we go.

Linh keeps turning her head to watch us, as we range across the roof. He has his sword out, and I'm taking a potshot here and there. But this guy really is a tank! He thinks like a tank too though. Linh taught me to use my vitae to be faster, and I'm a quick thinker on my feet. It takes a lot, but I eventually get him off balance, over-reaching. He's slashing and stabbing, but I manage to beat his blade aside, when he comes in with the off-hand for a grab. A tug, a spin, and there he goes. He doesn't even realize we're right at the edge.

Unfortunately, I hadn't realized just how strong this guy is. Holy shit. We're just barely over the edge, but he's taking me with him. And all the sudden his sword is flying through the air and the pavement is coming up on us real fast. I get a point-blank shot through his elbow, and it's enough to make him let go. Now or never, Ken.

The crunch when he lands is intense. No amount of chainmail is going to help a man who falls 60 feet to solid pavement. As loud as it is when he lands, the sound on my mind is different. Linh. I can hear her draw in a breath, and hold it. I hear her whisper, "No, please no." It sounds so soft, I'm not sure I could hear it standing right next to her, but I do. And I close my eyes and stretch my wings, gliding silently out, around the building, and back up to where Linh is bound. She's hanging her head low, and doesn't see me at first. I shift my weight and flap my wings a few times, trying to figure out how this body moves. This is going to take a lot of getting used to. And I'm not entirely sure how to get back.

Linh sees the movement and jerks her head up. I've never seen so much surprise in her eyes. I must look terribly uncomfortable, because she immediately knows what to say. "You have to know who you are Ken." It's still almost a whisper, raspy and exhausted. "Picture yourself. You can do it."

And then I'm standing in front of her again. It happens a lot slower this time, without the pressure of falling. I check the sky. We've got time -- but not much. I pull out my pocket knife and cut her loose.

Immediately, she slumps against me. So pale, paler than usual. Without really thinking, I offer her my wrist, and it seems like she waits a very long time, but she has no choice. After she takes what she needs, she flows gracefully again to her bat form and wings a few feet away. Then she looks back and waits.

I did it so fast last time, I'm not sure I really know how. I need to take myself by surprise again. I close my eyes, and believe I'm a bat, and there I am again. It starts fast, but takes a while. And we fly. I could get used to this.

Peng is waiting at the door to let us in. I come back to myself faster than Linh, just in time to catch her before she falls to the floor.

"I am beginning to see what she sees in you, Ken. Go, rest. I will take care of her." Peng nods as he speaks, taking her from me. And I trust him.

I stumble down the stairs, and fall into the earth.

It's the trip

I look at Linh, waiting to see whether we're going to run or fly.

"Peng tells me there are enough towns that we should be okay. If all else fails, I can teach you how to hunt deer." She melds into wolf form and takes off.

Traveling this way is new for me. It's suddenly a lot less cold, with all the thick fur. Paws are tougher than I expected, and the miles just fade away behind us. There is only a tiny sliver of moon in the sky, but so many stars shine down that it's easy enough to find our way between the trees. The scents are overwhelming at first, but after a while grow easier to process.

She makes me run later and later each night, waiting until our fur is almost singed before finally blending into the earth. Each night, I feel more wild. Each morning, the sun burns me less.

Three nights out, we find a small town. Simple folk in a small town are easy enough to feed from safely, a little from this one, a little from that. Big smiles, just passing through. My yes, it is late, isn't it? The stars are so lovely. We leave again midway through the night. Another night of travel beyond, and Linh makes good on her offer to teach me how to hunt. I may not know much about game trails, but the canine instincts immediately mesh with my abilities to stage an unseen ambush in the trees. Finally we bring down my first kill. I'm overcome by the impulse to sit before it and howl.

Linh comes to my side and howls with me. The howls soar across the sky together, melding into a single harmony. Far away, an answering howl begins, and another. This is a raw emotion human vocal cords cannot endure.

We drain the corpse and leave it for whatever scavengers or other wolves may find it. The answering howls tell me that this creature's sacrifice will not be wasted.

Ten days travel, in total, and we arrive in Winnipeg. We take a few days to feed and rest in a somewhat more traditional way for our kind. Between the long nights traveling, and the leisure we take in Winnipeg, I have a lot of time to think. Maybe a wolf's brain processes through things differently, but I'm finding myself more and more ready to seek my home and learn what has become of the people I care for. Becoming the beast without seems to have helped me closer to peace with the beast within.

Erie

We leave Winnipeg and just forge across the wilderness. I don't know exactly when, but at some point we cross into Minnesota and keep going east, through Wisconsin, until we get to the lake. The nights get shorter, the trees get greener, and by the time we cross into Pennsylvania, spring is in full bloom. We arrive in Erie to see the moon glinting off the lake, quiet and still. I walk with Linh through the streets, remembering. We reach Sally's street. Her father passed away a few years ago, but her mom is still alive as far as I know. I suspect Sally would have moved back in with her. But now that I'm here, I'm beginning to doubt.

"Come with me?" Linh looks a little surprised that I would ask. I know back in Saskatoon she wanted to confront her past alone, but I don't think that's the right way for me to overcome this challenge. I need a tie to my new existence, to remind me why I am here.

We sneak around the side of the house, and I can see there are lights on inside. It is after dinner time, but I see Sally's mom in the kitchen pouring herself a drink. It looks like she's talking, then she walks back into the living room. I came back around to that side of the house and, sure enough, there's Sally sitting on the couch. Then, all the sudden I'm flattened against the house, sliding down into the dirt. Why did I come back? Why am I even here? I can't talk to her. I can't see her. For the first time in a decade, I feel my heart beating in my chest. Then I feel Linh sitting next to me.

"Ken, you came here for a reason." Her voice is so quiet, I almost can't hear it. She glanced back up at the window again. "You need to do this." I think I'm just assuming I know what she would say, rather than hearing the individual words.

I stand and look back in the window again. It's open, a bit, with a cool breeze blowing through the screen. Then, a third person comes running into the room. It looks like a young girl, elementary school age. She's giggling and saying "Mommy, mommy, come play with me!" I freeze. Sally pulls the girl into her lap on the couch and starts tickling her and laughing. The little girl shrieks with glee.

Linh gently takes my elbow and guides me a few steps closer to the back of the house, deeper into the shadows. I don't know whether she heard something, or just knew someone was on their way over or what. Within moments, a car pulls into the driveway. Someone rings the doorbell. Sally's mom gets up to answer the door.

"Oh, hello Jane." Is that my mother? "Sandy hasn't gone to bed yet, come on it." She closes the door, but I can still hear the conversation through the window.

"I just wanted to bring her present by. I'm so sorry I missed the party." The tickling on the couch had stopped, and the little girl jumps up and runs over. "Grandma!" She gives my mom a giant hug.

I didn't know what to do other than bury my face in my hands. Some time later, I realize Linh has somehow gotten me out of there. But I don't know how, or what happened. Or where we are now.

I have a daughter. Why does that make things so different?

Prince Charming

When I wake up, we're in the woods again. Linh walks up next to me.

"We're a little ways outside town. There are some pretty good wild parks around here, so we should be able to stay unnoticed. I assume the people in town would recognize you." My head was still spinning a little. "I've arranged to introduce you to the prince. You mumbled something about needing to stay awhile, so you should get proper permission. He is a Nosferatu in Pittsburgh who runs half the state. Apparently, he tends to like our clan, so I think you'll be fine."

There's more she isn't saying. But I don't think it's the prince she's worried about.

We run hard, and make it there in two days. I haven't met a Nosferatu yet. She said it would be shocking, and it is, but I'm not sure it's worse than what I see inside myself some days. I stand my ground as he looks me up and down.

"Outlanders. I hear they know you are dead, Childe. Can I trust you not to cause problems?"

"Yes sir." Reflex. I think it's a smile, under that hood, behind the fangs, but it's very hard to tell.

"You understand that if a mortal sees you, if you break the Masquerade, Linh too will pay for your mistake."

"Yes sir."

"Fine. I need more eyes and ears up that way. I will send word to you if I require anything." He dismisses us. That was a long trip for not a whole lot. We get a head start back that night.

We get settled into a routine. Linh starts setting up a safehouse. She can be seen in town, so she's able to get a place where our kind can stay when traveling. A surprising number of Kindred come this way, passing east or west across the country. I have to be careful in town, so I almost always stay in the forest. In town, I use forms no one recognizes. Bats have funny ways of getting places. I find my way into Sally's attic, so I can learn who she is now, who Sandy is. I visit once a week or so, and the picture unfolds. A happy little girl, age 9, with beautiful blue eyes and a bright future. Sally works long shifts as a nurse, helping support her mom, who helps raise Sandy. All she needs is a dad, and we'd be living the American dream.

I like the routine. I need the routine. There's so much thinking I have to do, so much change to overcome, that I need the regularity to keep myself grounded in something. I almost feel like I'm there. Then I stop by and Sandy's crying. Not the kind where her friend was mean or she wants something her mom won't get her. Deep, terrified crying into her pillow. Downstairs, I can hear Sally crying too, talking to her mother.

"I don't know what to do. She keeps telling me she doesn't know what happened, she doesn't know where she's been. She looks so terrified, like there really are gaps in her memory. But I've never heard of something like this. The doctors at work think she's using some kind of drugs. The doctors I take her to see say she's in perfect health. I just want to know what's going on. What's happening to my baby. I..." Uh-oh. Her voice catches. I hear footsteps, and she picks up something off the mantle. "I still miss him so much, mom. He took everything in stride so calmly. Ken would know what to do."

The next time Linh checks on me, she can tell something's wrong. But I'm not talking. Not yet.

Days, weeks, a month or two go by. Good days and teary days. One night, again, I fly out. The swollen, gibbous moon hangs near the horizon, casting her long reflection over the lake. It is a beautiful sight from the sky.

I arrive at the house, just in time to see Sandy running, full tilt, down the street. Following her from above, I can hear her mumbling to herself. Something about terrible dreams, haunting her, chasing her. I lose track when she runs into the woods. I can't see through the thick canopy, so I descend to seek her on foot.

Trotting through the wood, I seek her scent where she ran in. Slowly, I'm able to follow her trail. After an hour tracking her, I hear a howl. Not just any howl, but a painful, seeking howl. A cry out not to anyone listening, almost assuming no one is listening, but a deep and beautiful song meant to bring someone from beyond this world. Before I realize I have changed directly, I am running towards it. Faster and faster, I burst into the clearing to see a young gray wolf, sitting forlorn and alone, slowly slumping down to the ground.

I want nothing more than to care for this lost soul. As I approach, and as she lays her head down on her paws, she looks at me with ice-blue eyes. And then she falls asleep. And as she sleeps, her fur fades away, and slowly, she melds back into the human form of my daughter.

That night, I learn that when a vampire cries, he sheds tears of blood.

Deadbeat No More

It's about an hour before dawn when she wakes. She looks up at me, blinking a few times, and her eyes grow wide. I tried to smile without showing my fangs. "Dad? Dad!" She leaps up and hugs me. I don't know what to do. I hug her back. She's crying and doesn't know what to say first.

"Mom said you died before I was born. She has all the pictures. You've been gone for so long. Why are you out here in the woods? What's happening? What am I?" I don't know where to start either, so I let her bombard me with questions for a while.

She finally settles on one. She pulls back and looks me in the face. "What am I? Are you like this too?"

"No, hon. I'm different. I...my..." I have to pause already. "My mentor, she told me about this. There are a lot of things we think are stories, but they're real. Fairies, ghosts, werewolves." Her face is so full of surprise, but she's nodding like she was ready to believe anything. "I...think you're a werewolf, hon." She nods again. I don't think she quite understands. "You can turn into a wolf."

She laughs. "That's silly." I shake my head and stand up.

"Come on, try it. Picture what a wolf looks like in your head and play make-believe." Slowly, she turns back into a wolf. I sit next to her and scratch her ears. After a minute, she turns back and makes a face.

"That's still silly." She does look like she believes it now, though. "So does that mean you are too? Or mom is?"

"I'm sure not. I don't know about your mom. Maybe it goes back further in the family, I don't really know how that works." I peek up at the sky, through the trees. "I only have another half an hour before I need to go."

Already, the tears started again.

"Shh, I'll come back hon. Right here, tonight, when the sun sets. Now, you need to get home to your mom, okay? But you have to promise you'll never ever mention me."

"But..."

"Promise!" I must look terrified, or terrifying. I could lose her, and Sally, and Linh, all in one instant.

"I promise." She sighs.

"Now run. I can't help you get back home any faster." She runs.

I wait right there, under the earth, all day. She must be early, or maybe I slept a touch late, because she's already there in the clearing when I come back out of the earth.

"Wow, that's a neat trick." She looks nervous.

"What's wrong, hon?"

"Well, I didn't tell them about you. Like I promised. But I always have weird dreams anyway, so I said it was another weird dream, and I didn't say it was you. Just some guy." I'm waiting for her to finish before I get angry. "My friend says you're a vampire." Oh boy, here we go. "I mean, you did say fairies and ghosts and werewolves are real. So why not vampires too?"

"Yeah, I did, didn't I. See, if anyone finds out we're real, some very powerful ones are going to get very mad at me. That's why I made you promise not to tell anyone."

"And why you had to go at sunrise, and wanted me to come back at sunset. And why you sleep underground." I nod.

"You're a smart one. Just like your mom." I can't hide the fangs in that smile. God I miss that woman.

"She says I'm smart like you."

"Don't me smart like me hon. Be smart like her. Save lives."

We talk for a while, but she can't stay up all night two nights in a row. Finally, I have to tell her to go home before she falls asleep out in the woods again.

"Sandy." I hadn't called her by name yet. It did make her pause.

"If you ever need me, I spend most of my time around here. You come out here at night and howl, and I'll hear you. You've got a beautiful voice, hon, and you can use it to call me any time you need. I'm going to see if I can find some folks like you, who can help you through this better than I can." How to say this? "I don't know what lore your friend tells you from the stories she reads, but vampires and werewolves...well...don't usually get along. It's extra important that no one finds out about me, and what I am, and that you're related to me. This has to be the biggest secret you ever keep." She nods, and this time, it looks like she's really taking it to heart.

"You're my dad anyway. But I won't tell." She runs off. Watching her go is difficult. I want the best for her. But I'm afraid to tell even Linh. I think this is the first task of my afterlife that I have to do without her.

I'm gonna make you an offer...

It takes me six months, but I find one. I operate as carefully as I can, up in New York, outside my prince's domain. Further from the majority of the Nosferatu's eyes and ears. I come into her range as a wolf, and invite her to find me. And as wolves, we speak the same language. An offering of peace -- a lost cub. In return, I have demands for her. Leaving me to my woods. Letting Linh come and go. A truce, as it were.

I am sure she can see through me, smell what I really am. They always can. But she spoke to me, so I thought a deal might be struck. Turns out, I'm right. She's willing to agree to what I've asked, in return for more information on where to find this cub.

"And if I raise her up to kill you?" she asks, as I am about to leave.

"Then I and mine have no reason not to wipe out your pack." I am confident in my unflinching stare.

"I have seen your kind in wolf's clothing before. They are ungainly, uncomfortable, unmistakable. You are different. You smell different, you move like one of us, like you have lived long enough in this skin to make it as much yours as any homid cub. You are a riddle that someday, I will solve. To be sure, no one would listen to you but a Stargazer, and only a Stargazer would be so desperate to bring in a lost cub. You are lucky to have found me. Anyone else, I would have killed."

I am brazen. I have to be, to keep the charade. "Then you are lucky I am the one who found your cub, and did not slaughter her." I leave, my emotions buried even deeper than the Beast within. And I do not change again until I am home safely in my woods.

And I speak none of it to Linh.

Fury

I can tell something is wrong when I reach the house. I hear a shriek and, when I get closer, words. "Oh my God! Sandy? Sandy!" I recognized Sally's voice. I perch on the window -- Sally is backed up against the bedroom door in a panic, and a large wolf is tearing up the room, about to lunge towards her. In a flash, I'm flying straight at the window, as fast as I can, changing from bat to wolf at the last second, crashing through. Sally's shrieks escalate as I attempt to pull Sandy's attention to me instead. "Don't you dare hurt my baby!" she screams. But she can't do much about it.

As we tussle, I manage to knock Sally down, away from the door, and break it open. I sink my teeth into Sandy's shoulder, and then run -- sure enough, she's ready to chase me and leave her mother behind. I run down the stairs and launch myself straight out the screen door. She is foaming at the mouth, her eyes gleaming with rage. This is just the kind of frenzy I've been taught to avoid, and now I'm actually trying to make her chase me? You're nuts, Ken. Certifiably nuts. You sure Linh isn't a Malky who's just been lying to you all along?

We sound like a loud dog fight as we chase our way out into the woods. In the end, when we're in the trees and can't run as fast, she moves into her full battle form -- easily eight feet tall and muscular. If I didn't stand a chance before, I've got nothing now. I see now what Linh meant about a Garou's fangs. They wound like no other. I was within an inch of destruction when I finally hit the ground long enough to sink in.

I count seconds, waiting. Minutes, an hour. It's past midnight now. Dare I come out, or do I wait for tomorrow night?

All the stories I have heard of these frenzies say they end quickly, and with exhaustion. I decide to chance it. I coalesce back up out of the earth, and find myself lying in a pool of my own blood. She is still sitting against a tree nearby. I can tell she's been crying. She jerks her head up when she sees me, and runs over.

"Please tell me your shoulder is okay, hon." My voice is just as much a disaster as the rest of me. I can't even stand. I don't want to know how bad I look. I drag myself out of the bloody mud.

"My shoulder?" there is hysteria in her voice. "Look what I did to you! I'm a monster!" I laugh. It's a terrible sound -- she had almost ripped out my throat.

I close my eyes for a moment, and heal myself like Linh taught me. Only, these wounds are different, and it takes much more out of me. I can only heal a little. But it's noticeable. And I'm able to stand. So, I haul myself to my feet, but Ithat's about the limit of what I can do.

"How can I help?" she sounds desperate. "What do you need? Medicine? Bandages? Blood?" I actually gag a bit, when she puts that thought in my mind. She thrusts out her wrist at me. "Anything I can do to help." I push it away.

"No, hon, I can't."

"I didn't want to hurt anyone, not mom, not you, and here I am. If it's all I can do, let me do this."

"No, I literally can't. It would kill me right now. I will have to find my blood elsewhere. Kill me a deer if you must."

So she did. Not much, but enough of a snack for me to get home, or at least hide in the ground if I don't make it before sunrise.

"Sandy, please do not blame yourself. All of us are okay. You need to learn from this, not push it away in anger."

"You sound just like Nina." She's almost pouting when she says it, but at least that means she's finally calming down.

"Then you've got a good mentor."

Sandy sighs, then stretches her arm a bit. "My shoulder is pretty sore. That's a nasty bite you have, Dad."

I laugh helplessly. "Yours is pretty bad too, hon. Doesn't your mother make you brush your teeth?"

A Tangled Web

I manage to lug myself back to my home base, not that same night, but early the next. Linh is waiting for me. Before she notices me, she looks cross. Once she sees me, her whole face changes.

"Ken, what happened?"

I make a face. "I think I met a Garou." Fear. That look on her face is fear. She takes three swift steps towards me and slaps me across the face.

"I told you in a standup fight you'd be dust. I told you."

"I know, Linh. And for once, you were wrong." I haven't found as much to eat as I need, but I did heal a little more before I got back. "You should've seen it before. Boy was I a mess."

Linh gets even sharper. "Worse than this? Dammit Ken. I taught you better."

I close my eyes. "I saved a life, Linh. Maybe two. And I came out of it better, stronger, and more myself. This is exactly what you taught me."

I could feel her fighting back anger, and starting to understand. "If I bring you a criminal, will you drink?"

"I don't think I have a choice right now."

Shock, Betrayal and the Strength of Blood

The next night, I go back to Sandy's clearing. Still hurt and using all my power to heal, I go on my normal two feet. It takes a long time. Much longer than flying, and I'll probably have to spend the day here.

I walk into the clearing, and there's Sandy, waiting. With Sally waiting behind her. It doesn't even register until I hear her gasp.

"My God, he looks just like the day he left."

I just sink. Sitting there on the grass, I don't know what to do.

"Sandy, why? I told you you couldn't..."

"Dad, she knows about me. She remembers the other night. I don't know why, none of the other people who see me do, but she knows. She remembers what I did."

Anger flashes across my face. I can feel it, but I can't stomp it down fast enough.

"I almost died once to save you both, and now you're risking all of us!" Sandy freezes in place, horrified. Immediately, I hate the way I said that.

"I'm sorry, hon. I know it's not easy to be you. Maybe I'm jealous that you get to keep your family and I can't. But really, I can't. Sally -- take care of her. Live your own life. I can't ever come back. I..."

Sally walks straight up to me and buries her face in my shoulder, crying. "What did this to you?"

"What, the bite marks? Our lovely child." I still have scratches across my face and arms, a big gouge in one leg.

"No." She pulls my jaw open a bit, and looks at the fangs.

"It's a long story."

"How long?"

"Oh boy, at least 11 years running now." She buries her face in my shoulder again, making me wince. It's late enough in the night that the blood is starting to soak through my bandages. Sally pulls back.

"I'll give you the short version." I take off my shirt, and pull the gauze off my shoulder. It's pretty obvious that wound doesn't look like the rest. Sandy is starting at me, confused.

"That doesn't look like a bite."

I look back at Sally, and she's tearing up again. "No, baby, it's not. It's a gunshot wound. The kind that kills people." She walks up closer again. "It probably hit a major artery. If you came in to our ER, we'd say there's nothing we can do for you. If you even made it to the ER alive."

"It's my souvenir from Vietnam. I died there. This was someone's way of bringing me back. Sally, you can't even breathe a word to anyone. The rest of my kind are monsters. They see people as food, and Sandy's kind as the worst enemy. If they ever find out you know we exist, they will strike you down. Even my mentor can't know you've seen me. No one."

I turn to Sandy.

"I may not be around as much now. You're growing up, and you have Nina to look out for you. But I need to move on as well. I'll always come back to visit...if you howl for me long enough, I'll find you. Take care of your mom, hon. She needs you."

Walking out of that clearing is the hardest thing I've done.

And Then There Was One

Linh takes another week nursing me back to health. It's longer than she really needs to, but I'm happy enough to have some rest after all the tumult in my life. Normally, I talk these things through with her. This time, I can't. Somehow, I'm managing it all anyway, and I feel okay about where things are.

I finally go out for another flight one night. It feels good to be back in the sky. Linh has been dropping some hints that I could begin working myself up some reputation by taking an assignment from the prince. It's easier for me to travel than for most Kindred, and I need to start building ties, or something.

I grab a bite and head over to the safe house. Indeed, there is a messenger there, who has some word from the price on an errand needed in upstate New York. I get the details. It's just going to talk to someone and get some information, seems easy enough. I expected to see Linh, but she isn't around. I head back to my woods, and in my usual little clearing, I find a note.

Ken,

I have Sired before, more than once, though it was quite a long time ago. None of my Childer have made it past their first quarter century. No amount of teaching and mentoring has saved them. Why?

The people I choose -- they have high morals, great ideals, grand plans for fixing the world. But they don't live up to it. They make great martyrs. But I don't want a great martyr. I want a survivor, a fighter, a hunter. One who can hold these ideas, understand them, and take one tiny step at a time. I need someone who knows that a war is not won in a day, but over years and years of individual battles. Celebrating small triumphs, overcoming setbacks, fighting for every shred of progress. Perseverance. Tenacity. What kind of man -- or more importantly, what kind of Beast -- can embody all of that, without losing sight of the humanity of his goal?

A man who has fought winning battles in a losing war. A man trained to do the right thing, but to carry out each mission without feeling. A man who is aware of his limits, but knows how to lead a team to expand them. A man who understands casualties, while at the same time fighting for others who cannot fight for themselves. A man who knows what kind of world he wants for his daughter.

I did not think he existed until I found you. I would have followed you back here after the war. I would have tracked you until your life was winding down, like Peng, staring into your own sunset. But one stray bullet robbed you of that life, and I took you early. So few of us have the ability to turn that taking into a gift.

The moment has come for me to let you go. This time, I know you will fly.

We will meet again some day.

Linh Tuyen Chu